A busy day for blogging...feel like i have lots to say today with so little words.

Buddy vomited again all over my bed...this meant having to strip it all down and wash my duvet and pillow cases (which is where most of the vomit ended up) again. She did this yesterday too...poor thing. So laundry is going and soon i'll have to start supper i suppose.

Almost 6pm, N is still asleep i guess or isn't online. I guess he isn't in the mood to chat.

M drove me over to the postal outlet and i was told the parcel is out on the truck, that it had been sent back out and sure enough there was a date on the card (todays date) saying it would be delivered today...was it, noooooooo...and given that it is almost 6pm i have given up on it arriving today too. Sigh.

Sue set mothers hair last night after i washed it and mother took the rollers out a little while ago, so i just finished combing it all out and spraying it into place. I affectionately call this 'helmet head'...so she is all set, having had her bath earlier. She always is a bit more chipper once she is bathed and her hair done. I really must take her to the hairdresses...i need mine colours and cut though i can ill afford it, it needs to be done.

I am thinking of calling N... but if he is sleeping i'd hate to wake him...maybe he just doesn't feel like being online and talking to me...so i shouldnt call..i don't know. Wish he'd come online.

I feel less panicky after taking the alprazalam, thank goodness for it..i take it before i go out too, to help those attacks that invariably happen when i go out and are around strange people, especially strange men. I wish i didn't feel this way... i want to be normal again.

Whatever normal is....